When Rest Finds You (Even When You Didn't Ask for It)
by Kendra Laughlin, LPC, AASECT-Certified Sex Therapist in Oklahoma
Inhale.
Exhale.
One day at a time.
Be kind to myself.
That’s the mantra I’ve been trying to follow. But to be honest, some days I forget.
Instead, I spiral. I find myself stuck with myself. Forced to go inward. Forced to get quiet enough to hear what the universe might be trying to teach me.
This summer didn’t bring what I imagined-the slow evening walks, Saturdays at the farmers market, pool days, or spontaneous freedom that summer can offer. Instead, it’s looked like something else entirely: time in bed, healing, indoors, and on pause. I had surgery, and with it came not only physical immobility, but a deep emotional stillness too.
It’s been a kind of rewinding.
Back to the high school version of me, not driving, relying on others, with way more feelings this time around.
I often tell my clients:
If you don’t make time for rest, your body will force you into it.
And, I guess I had to learn that one the hard way.
I’ve spent the last 8 years single parenting, navigating deep relationships, running a business, and holding emotional space for others, while also doing the invisible work that comes with trauma healing and self-growth. I wouldn’t have chosen this much downtime. But maybe this season is the kind I needed.
Because it’s already teaching me:
To slow down
To name what actually feels like a priority in my life
To ask for help (and receive it)
To take in this quiet time with my daughter
And to remember that every season, even the hard ones are temporary
I’m two weeks post-op and one month without driving. There’s no magical finish line here, but I’m starting to see that the real “gold” might just be walking again, regaining my independence, and being able to stand on both feet, literally and emotionally.
What This Has to Do with Therapy
So often, people come to therapy during transitions like this, when something interrupts their regular rhythm. Whether it’s physical injury, heartbreak, burnout, or just realizing you’ve been moving through life on autopilot, therapy helps slow the spin.
In trauma therapy, and in EMDR specifically, we talk about what happens when your nervous system is overwhelmed or in survival mode for too long. You might find yourself exhausted but unable to rest, craving support but terrified to ask for it, emotionally numb or deeply reactive, or all of the above.
Therapy can help you gently tune back in. To befriend your body. To learn how to stop pushing so hard. To untangle patterns of perfectionism, over-functioning, or emotional isolation. And yes, therapy can also help you feel safe enough to receive love, rest, abundance, and support.
As a sex therapist and trauma therapist in Oklahoma, I support people in seasons like this all the time. The stuck seasons. The quiet ones. The rebuilding ones.
A Little Invitation
Maybe you’re not in a surgical boot or lying in bed for days like me. But maybe there’s a part of you that’s quietly asking for more space, more slowness, more permission to pause. Maybe your nervous system is whispering that it’s time to heal.
So here's your gentle nudge to slow down today. Take your daily walk a little more slowly. Look up at the sky. Notice the steadiness of your own two feet. That’s what’s on my wish list right now.
And maybe that’s enough.
Interested in therapy with me?
I offer trauma-informed, EMDR, and sex therapy for individuals and couples in Oklahoma. Whether you’re healing from burnout, untangling old patterns, or learning how to trust rest. I’m here.